Tuesday, September 18, 2012

#8- Insecurities

Much has happened these past few months. I guess the most interesting being that I started dating a girl. Then I lost her.

It got me thinking, am I just not good enough? I've always had these thoughts about myself. Doesn't just apply to dating, applies to everything really. Studies, music, etc.

I always feel like I'm never good enough. There are so many things I hate about myself, but just don't know how to change. The thing is, do I really need to change? Or do I just accept that I am who I am, and make the best of it?

Sometimes, when I decide to attempt to write a song, I get this mental block. I constantly feel like whatever I come up with isn't good enough. Obviously, I'm no Yorke or Boyd or Mayer but I always strive on making something.. different. Unique. After many attempts, I realize that maybe I just don't have it in me.

Then there's dating. Based on the recent failed relationship, I realized that I wasn't good enough for her. Maybe I didn't try hard enough. Maybe she was expecting too much. I don't know.

I feel so insecure about so many things about myself that often I get into this self-loathing phase. That being, right now.

Song Of The Night:

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